The Dread Pirates of San Juan Island
Strap in, guys. This post is a long one.
After that crossing though, I'm about ready to call it the "Strait of Juan de F*ck Ya."
We left Port Townsend refreshed, excited, full of hope and delicious food. It was a clear day with a light wind. And for once, both of our weather apps agreed. "You'll be fine," the apps said. "This crossing will be a breeze. Ha, get it? Breeze?" Nobody was laughing. We were all busy trying to keep our lunches down.
The Strait of Juan de Fuca is a large body of water that connects Puget Sound to the Atlantic Ocean, so it has some very bizarre wind and current conditions that are difficult to predict.
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| I stole this map from the internet. Please don't come at me for copyright infringement. I can't afford it. I live on a boat. |
Giant container ships also pass through constantly, carrying all of your favorite Temu goodies from Asia which also don't help with unpredictable waves. Or at least it was unpredictable to me. Justin drove and I bopped around the boat, feeding children, cleaning cat detritus, feeding cats, cleaning children detritus. And suddenly moving around the boat became very difficult as the waves began to build.
The trick to surviving rough waves is to plan ahead. Take your dramamine early. Set things up so nothing important falls over. Get snacks and munchies and just sit down. As an experienced boater with years of seasickness under my belt, I completely forgot these tricks and did none of these things. By the time I took dramamine, my stomach was roiling. All I wanted to do was lean over the rail and toss every cookie I had ever ingested. While I didn't get any pictures or video of the rough waves or moving boat (I was fighting for my life, give me break) I did get a picture of a very seasick Tiny. She looked just as bad as I felt.
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| This was right before Tiny barfed all over the kitchen. |
Unfortunately, I couldn't barf all over the kitchen like Tiny did for several reasons. First, I was the one who would have to clean it up. But most importantly, I couldn't let the kids know I was sick because they are not aware that sea sickness is a thing. Throughout the crossing, Abigail and Morgan played with a little less vim and vigor than usual and did a little more laying on the couch. I knew that if I told them I felt sick, they would suddenly realize being sick was an option and it would exacerbate any symptoms they were experiencing. So I had to swallow down my agony and vomit and wait it out.
Eventually, we completed the crossing and arrived in a quiet anchorage at the southeast end of San Juan Island.
Abigail scraped her legs on these logs so many times. Her blood shall remain on the island forever.
The next few days were slow and simple.
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| They were looking for the Loch Ness Monster's cousin. |
My seasickness went away, but my sinus infection from the week before was still hanging on. And while we're having these fabulous adventures, I unfortunately have a day job and have to spend my weekdays working in the pilot house. We do want to spend our time maximizing fun and exploring and seeing new things, but there's something to be said for taking time to wind down and relax.
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| Morgan decided this stick is just the right size. |
We stayed in this anchorage for a week. Each day, we would take the kids to the beach a couple times and let them run and play for an hour or so until they got bored, then bring them back to the boat where they are pretty content to play with their toys and/or try to kill each other.
Don't worry, I brought extra pants.
I'll admit, I felt a little guilty just sitting at anchor and not even taking the kids to explore the rest of the island. But there wasn't anything to feel guilty about. The kids were happy, we were happy, and we all deserved a little rest. Plus, we had the hot tub to tire the kids out.
I told you we have a hot tub on the boat.
Justin did take the kids to the local town of Friday Harbor to explore for an hour, and they brought back some delicious birria quesadillas for me.
These are definitely not authentic, but still yummy because I didn't cook them.
I can also blame our inactivity on the weather. On our one wet, dreary day Justin and I did not feel like braving the rain and taking the kids to the beach.
Rain, rain, go away. Come again never.
But we managed to keep the kids busy. I found a paper doll template on the internet, and it occupied the kids for an entire 15 minutes so I could write up last week's blog.
Not pictured: the doll Morgan made with X's for eyes that look like zombie.
Or, I could have just blamed our lack of activity on Justin. One of the things he worked on in Port Townsend was installing thrusters in the bottom of the boat. These (if they ever work) will allow our boat to move side-to-side and not just forward and backwards. Justin realized that there was a part he needed to finish installing the thruster, and that part had to be shipped from Europe. We decided to ship the part to the packing store in Port Orchard we use as a mailbox, and when we had a chance, drive down and get it. Our anchorage was conveniently close to a car rental store and ferry in Friday Harbor. We expected the part to arrive after the 4th of July, but right before we were about to go to bed July 2nd, we realized the part was early and would be arriving in Port Orchard the next day. And so, I got to go get it.
Thus began my side quest: Operation Pizza. For those of you uninterested in this side quest, just scroll down to the next video.
"Wait, what?" You ask. "I thought you were picking up a boat part. What does pizza have to do with this?" Don't worry, we'll get there. I warned you this would be a long post. To get back to Port Orchard, I got to rent a car, hop a ferry, and drive three hours through Seattle and Tacoma traffic. Then on the way back, stop and pick up ten Sbarro's pizzas.
One of Justin's favorite foods is Sbarro's pizza. Obviously we couldn't count on Sbarro's having too many waterfront locations on this trip, so before we left, Justin ordered ten whole pizzas, cut them up, and froze them . However, he ended up going through those pizzas faster than expected. And since I was headed back to Port Orchard, I was voluntold into picking up ten more pizzas for Justin to freeze.
I knew I was going to be doing a ton of driving and this side quest would take a while, so I booked a room on July 3rd at a hotel in Everett. Now, this wasn't a fancy hotel. It's clearly a favorite among low level construction workers and battered women hiding from their husbands. Not a popular hotel for pizza parties. Plus, I booked one room for one person for one night. Was the girl at the desk going to think I was throwing a massive rager? Was she going to throw me out for bringing in way too much food for one person to possibly eat in one night? Was there a rule against excess pizza? Would I need to use one of the pizzas as a bribe?
I managed to make it through the lobby with only a weird look from the girl at the desk. I was exhausted from driving about six hours altogether that day, so when the pizzas and I got into the elevator, I was not ready for small talk. Unfortunately, the poor construction guy in the elevator didn't know that. He kindly asked if I was delivering from a Sbarro's nearby.
I couldn't go into it. I couldn't explain what I just took three paragraphs to break down, plus I would have to tell him all about the whole "living on a boat thing." I just said. "No. It's a long story." And shut the poor man down. I could tell from his accent he wasn't a native English speaker and I could see the gears turning in his head trying to figure out where in the conversation he had mis-translated something. It was one of the most uncomfortable elevator rides of my life. Looking back, I definitely should have given the poor guy a pity slice.
After cutting up and freezing the pizza, I went back out to do some grocery shopping. Having a car for a couple days was a luxury, so I stocked up on some Walmart essentials. I decided afterwards I deserved a treat, so I grabbed a milkshake at the nearby drive-thru. As I came back in to the hotel, again, the girl at the desk gave me a very concerned look. I realized she had just seen me come in with 10 pizzas, and now I was holding a strawberry milkshake. She must be worrying my arteries are going to explode. She probably had an ambulance on speed dial all night just in case.
The next morning I managed to sneak all ten pizza boxes to the dumpster and make my escape. I drove the rest of the way back to the ferry and met Justin with the groceries and two cooler bags of the hard-earned Sbarro. The kids had fun playing around Friday Harbor while we moved everything to Little Boat.
All seals are named "Nomi," statues included.
When we got back to our anchorage, the wind picked up. We had been considering taking the day to explore the island, but decided with the weather it would be safer to just stay on the boat. And it was a good thing we did.
The anchorage was definitely not crowded, but being a holiday weekend a few more boats had joined us in our anchorage. And we noticed one of our nautical neighbors was slowly drifting closer and closer to us.
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| Hey, you! Get off my lawn! |
The wind got stronger, and it was soon clear nobody was on the boat. They must have taken their own dinghy to the island for the day. The wind had pulled the other boat's anchor loose, and it was drifting aimlessly in the wind. Although, for something drifting aimlessly it had pretty good aim.
Justin realized what was going on just in time for the other boat to run into us.
It was much more important for me to hold the phone than actually help with the situation.
After the smash, we had a few options. We could just let the other boat drift away. After all, it wasn't our problem. Our anchor was secure; we hadn't done anything wrong. But with the unexpected wind, this boat could be half-way to the Pacific Ocean by the time its owners returned. If our boat had gotten loose and floated away, we would want a friendly person to rescue it.
Or, I pointed out, we don't have to be friendly and give this boat back. Finders keepers. By the rules of the Pirate Code, this boat and everything on it is technically ours to plunder.
And so, we added a new boat to our fleet.
We already have a big boat and Little Boat, so we decided to name our booty Medium Boat. We're really good at naming boats, guys.
We have an armada!
After an hour or so of being rafted together, the original owners of Medium Boat arrived. To my dismay, they were not scurvy curs and we did not get to have a giant pirate battle. Instead, they were a friendly couple with their teenage son who had gone to the island for a holiday adventure. We agreed to stay rafted for a few hours while the wind died down, and they were so thankful for rescuing our boat, they brought over some shrimp they caught fishing, fresh fruit and delicious guacamole. Or it may have been a bribe to keep us from plundering further. We'll never know.
Don't worry, I didn't have to share. Nobody else onboard eats healthy things.
That evening, just as the sun was setting, the wind died down enough for Medium Boat to unraft and we managed to untangle our anchors. Medium Boat drove off into the night just in time for fireworks.
I know, nobody wants to see firework videos. You can deal with it for a few seconds.
The next day, the weather improved and we were feeling pretty good about ourselves. After all, for a few hours there we had an armada. I decided that I was finally energized enough to explore San Juan Island National Preserve.
While technically not a National Park, a big chunk of San Juan Island is a park with neatly maintained trails and vastly different ecosystems from the beach we had been playing on all week. We managed to find a path and hike up into the trees and found ourselves suddenly in a lush rainforest.
There probably weren't bears in these woods. Probably.
Along the trail were signs educating hikers about the local plants and animals. It also conveniently indicated to directionally challenged people like myself we were on the right path.
Summarized, the sign said: Humans ruin everything.
I swear, a bald eagle flew past here one minute earlier.
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| Yes, Morgan is wearing three shirts in this picture. |
The next day the weather was finally calm enough to move the boat and continue our piracy in the San Juan Islands!
Tl;dr: We anchored off San Juan Island for a week and got hit by another boat.
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